officeragentparker:
Sports Night (September 22, 1998 – May 16, 2000)
You’re watching Sports Night on CSC, so stick around.
“The truth is I have a job that involves me and stimulates me and rewards me and takes up a lot of my time and I’m not willing to do my job just a little bit, I want to do all of it. It’s part of me and I’m different without it. And that is who I am, and that is who you need to love.” - Dana Whitaker, Sports Night
Jeremy: Part of what you said is true.
Dan: Really?
Jeremy: I have to stand firm, not to establish an upper hand but to establish equality.
Dan: Exactly.
Jeremy: We’ll have an argument and she will take a position that absolutely defies logic. Now, I have a pretty good respect for logic. But then all she has to do is put on one of my shirts.
Dan: The shirt.
Jeremy: She’ll grab a white dress shirt from my closet.
Dan: You’re cooked.
Jeremy: It’s over.
Dan: That’s it!
Jeremy: Like bishop to queen’s rook 7.
Dan: Keep going.
Jeremy: My chess team was playing Lakeland. I start my match king’s pawn 3, king’s pawn 3. Bam, bam bam. All of a sudden the guy moves bishop to queen’s rook 7. I lost 32 moves later, but I was never even in it.
Dan: Right. And that relates to Natalie wearing your shirt how?
Jeremy: I have to stand firm. Thank you.
Dan: Right.
-Sports Night 1x10 “Shoe Money Tonight”
Jeremy: Natalie.
Natalie: Hello.
Jeremy: Just the woman I’m looking for.
Natalie: Coming out of the mouth of anyone but the guy I just broke up with, that’d make my day.
Jeremy: I broke up with you, but that seems neither here nor there. Can I talk to you a second?
Natalie: Yeah, I broke up with you there, Mr. “Obviously has a short-term memory loss with a myriad of other problems, which I won’t even go into, but thinks that he broke up with me because of the short-term memory loss, which is so obvious.”
Jeremy: No need to be so formal. I’ve seen you naked. Call me Jeremy.
-Sports Night 2x17 “Draft Day Part I”
Casey: Hey, did you catch the stats in the Philadelphia-Anaheim game?
Natalie: Can you believe it?
Casey: 179 penalty minutes.
Natalie: In a 60-minute game.
Casey: That’s crazy.
Natalie: Not as crazy as Dana coming back from dinner without her panties.
Casey: What?
Natalie: Hmm?
Casey: What’d you say?
Natalie: When?
Casey: Just then.
Natalie: Nothing.
Casey: Dana came back from dinner without her panties?
Natalie: No.
Casey: Why’d you say she did?
Natalie: It’s just an expression.
Casey: You said it’s not as crazy as Dana coming back from dinner without her panties.
Natalie: Well, technically it’s not, Casey.
-Sports Night 2x04 “Louise Revisited”
Natalie: Is there a number?
Casey: What?
Natalie: Is there a set number of women?
Casey: I don’t know.
Natalie: ‘Cause if there’s a set number of women, maybe you can just get them out of the way, bing bam boom.
Casey: Bing bam boom?
Natalie: That was me getting women out of the way really fast.
-Sports Night 2x02 “When Something Wicked This Way Comes”
Jeremy: You should really call technical support.
Natalie: I like it when you fix it. It’s so cute and nerdy. I could just lick you up.
Jeremy: This is a serious computer problem, I don’t want to fool around with this.
Natalie: What does “err” mean?
Jeremy: Call technical support.
Natalie: What does “err” mean?
Jeremy: It means a mistake.
Natalie: Is it Latin?
Jeremy: It’s English. It’s “E-R-R”. It means error. Call technical support.
Natalie: “Minus-1, SM Trunc”, what does it mean?
Jeremy: Natalie—
Natalie: Come on, just one.
Jeremy: It means the truncation indicator alone is wider than the specified width. It probably also indicates a “Minus-5 Type SCP” which is an invalid queue element.
Natalie: Okay. Then it says “Minus-15, out of range.” What does that mean?
Jeremy: It means it’s out of range.
Natalie: You’re not doing this right!
Jeremy: What the hell are we doing?
Natalie: Well I thought we were having phone sex, but I guess you just weren’t interested.
Jeremy: We were having phone sex?
Natalie: Well not phone sex, but whatever. We were having sex.
Jeremy: I didn’t even know.
Natalie: And frankly, it showed up in your performance.
Jeremy: I wasn’t having sex.
Natalie: I know that, Jeremy, I was sitting here having sex all by myself.
Jeremy: You were having sex.
Natalie: Yes.
Jeremy: Well I think maybe you’re not doing it right.
Natalie: Call technical support.
-Sports Night 1x12, “Smoky”
